Beer Open 2020

(Written by Chris Prouty)

Presumptions, Presumptions - 1:20p
Darren Tait, John Prouty, Kevin Sarsany, Todd Weiss
Three former champs in this group + a stick who should have tasted the glory by now. They are locked, loaded (ahem), and ready to roll. They have the pole position. They can practically taste the glory and the event is still 48 hours out! They get the dreaded 'Favorites' black mark. Good luck gents.
Odds: 3 - 2

Reigning First Loser - 1:28p
Patrick Kleszynski, Pat Collins, William Brumett, Andrew Brady
Oh the Sizzler is mad. So mad. His reigning champs took the dreaded first loser spot. What is a Sizzler to do? Look in the mirror? Please. That's a Melzl move? To correct matters, Sizzler did the BO equivalent of firing the hitting coach during a losing streak. Out with Matt, in with Andrew, SIZZLER UBER ALLES!!!!!!
Odds: 5-1

Keep an Eye on Your Bourbon - 1:36p
Mike Colgan, Brian Byrne, Lee Erwin, Tom Melzl
We are combining so many strengths here: a reigning Karlito champ, German Man, the only father-in-law of a current Beer player, and the one and only Buddy Lee (who will be wearing camo pants - in case you want to sync wardrobes for the big day). What more could one ask for? Their Odds? I'm glad you asked. The best Odds Tommy has ever had in The Open.
Odds: 7-1

MMMMBop - 1:44p
Brandon Bilbrey, Joe Monegato, Chris Marinelli, Michael Marinelli
A lot talent on this team. Not much golf ability. Really, the only question is which hole Brando will take his shirt off. I'm calling the second hole. Brando, do not get us booted off the course! If you want Odds on shirtless Brando/Hole/Box Jump Tommy copy catting, please see Goose. Their Odds for the golf component of the BO are not awesome.
Odds: 305 - 1

BEER4EVAH - 1:52p
Craig Gantar, Eric Burns, Karl Krewenka, Paul DelAguila
Every year we have at least one ALL BEER team. They never do very well. To fix that, we held a secretive, Beer Player ONLY outing in June called the Karlito. Only ALL BEER teams allowed. Guess what? An ALL BEER team won. Yeah! It was MY team! SWEET. That's a bunch of rambling preamble to point out that I already have a victory this year and that this team is not winning anything.
Odds: 200 - 1

The Dreamsicle Team - 2:00p
Beh Afshar, Benton Zeiser, Rich Kenney, Justin O'Reilly
There have been 2 repeat champs in the history of the BO. If you are a member of one of those teams, that will be the top bullet point on your gravestone. Legends. There are 2 members of one of those wonder squads here. Can adding a little O'Reilly magic to that foundation bring more magic? Let's just say they are a dark horse. Very dark.
Odds: 80 - 1

Steak... - 2:08p
Dave Bennet, Michael Donlin, Dennis Roberts, Joe McIntosh
Ok. Here comes the first of the Northern Oak Park super teams. The ONE of the 1-2 punch of fists of furies of .... look, who knows what these guys are bringing? They have the BO rabbit's foot (Mike Donlin, four time winner!), they have a pair of sticks in Roberts and McIntosh, and they have Dave 'I've shot a 110, a 92, and an 81 in my last three rounds' Bennet. Let's just all be wary.
Odds: 8 - 1

... & Eggs - 2:16p
Dave Willsey, Mike Wysockey, Roger Rhomberg, Jeff Adair
This is the other half of that NOP 1-2 punch. Willsey and Wysockey will cover the amazingly-competent-golf-from-a-pair-of-drunks corner that is oh-so-important to own in the BO. Then Rhomberg and Adair will hit the other 98% of the shots required to win the thing. I'm feeling it with these guys. They get the coveted second favorites spot.
Odds: 3 - 1

Abacab Was Gensis's Best Album - 2:24p
Andrew DeCraene, Brendan McLaughlin, Andrew Volckens, Chris Prouty
Well, it finally happened. There was a BO team so true and perfect and just darn good that immediately after winning the BO with an all time record score, they ascended to the heavens on puffy clouds driven by baby unicorns with rainbow wings. Thus, we do not have a reigning champ team this year. They were broken up like the short sighted unforeseen consequences of an NHL expansion draft run by drunk idiots. Good news is there is no bitterness.
Odds: 57 - 1

No, It Was The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway, You Idiot - 2:32p
Bill Bush, Craig Ross, Mark Witt, John McNamara
When that puffy cloud driven by baby unicorns fell apart, Witt and Bush found themselves saddled up with an old BO colleague / former champ with a funny accent. They roped in McNamara ("you'll love it we swear") and are all charged up to be the first repeat half champs. Or half repeat champs? Or champ half repeats? Whatever. They want to win and they have a chance. I swear.
Odds: 11 - 2